I regularly do workshops for couples so help them improve and heal their relationships. One part of the workshop is devoted to creating rituals of connection. Stable, happy couples have routines that support their connection and keep their loving feelings alive.
Maintaining these routines can be especially hard when one or both of you travel and your regular connection rituals get interrupted. If you have to deal with trying to stay connected across a distance, here’s some long distance relationship tips or suggestions that may help you keep your love alive when you can’t physically hold and touch each other every day.
1. Begin and end the day with good mornings and good nights via phone, text or video call.
2. Read together via audio or video call.
3. Read on your own and daily share what you read or are learning.
4. Watch a favorite show/movie at the same time while you’re on an audio or video call together.
5. Eat at least one of your meals together using video calling.
6. Maintain your daily routines (if time zones allow) via video call, ex. meditate/pray/devotions/shower-dress/review what’s coming up in your day…etc. while you’re on a call together.
NOTE: wireless earphones help a lot with this, so you’re hands-free with full mobility. It’s a good idea to invest in a couple of good sets so you can easily hear each other without a lot of background noise. Most bluetooth headsets will pair with either your smart phone or your computer.
7. Send photos to each other throughout the day; pics of meetings, locations, food and snack pics.
8. Create a private Facebook group for just the two of you and use FB Live stream to leave video messages if you can’t meet in synchrony.
9. Make time for audio or video calls, have appointments prearranged and keep those calls a priority.
10. If you’re the partner that travels, take a few things from home to make the travel location a bit homier, especially a photo of your sweetheart to put on the bedside lamp table. A pillow case your partner has slept with, or sprayed with their favorite scent, is a way to have their pheromone (love scent) with you when you settle down for the night away from home.
11. If your internet isn’t good enough to support Skype try to supplement the video stream with talking on the phone. It’s really nice to see each other but lags are a drag and there’s less problem with delays on the phone. There are also some good video conferencing programs that use less bandwidth and have better video quality than Skype – like Zoom and/or VSee. Facetime is also great if you are Apple users.
12. Be sure to talk/text/email romantically, not just routinely. It’s easy at a distance to start being just business and having boring check-ins. Talk attraction and share your tender feelings.
13. Get some stick texting apps – they add a whole level of expressiveness to text messages and can bring a lot of playfulness in.
14. Leave a surprise for your sweetie to discover while you are apart, or send a package to him/her.
Remember, it takes attention to our relationships and each other to be strong, confident and secure with each other. I hope some of these tips will help you when you have to be apart from the one you love.
If you have other suggestions or are using any of these, please leave a comment. It’s always fun for me, as a bit of a road warrior, and a tekkie, to hear other great ideas you may use to make long distance relational things work.
Note: Photo credits to http://www.wikihow.com/